I’m at a stage in my life where I’m confused. And I’m confused as to what’s confusing me and why. So in an attempt to figure that out, I will write about the things that have been especially on my mind the past few days.
nostalgia |näˈstaljə, nə-|A sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations: I was overcome with acute nostalgia for my days in college.
Lately I’ve been consumed into the past, not my own personal past, but just the world’s past. I find myself infatuated by the image of teenagers – or just people in general – in the 60s – 90s. Perhaps I find their culture intriguing because I haven’t experienced it, but it was just different. There was a lot going on. Outspoken people weren’t scarce, or at least not as scarce as they are now. I guess that’s the main reason I’m amazed and mesmerized by the beauty of that rebellious time period.
Therefore, instead of being caught up in the past, I have found my way to adapt my desires and cravings for a different spectrum of pop culture and that is through my blog. I’ve started this in hopes of getting to know people that feel the same way as I do. People that are intrigued by the honest, the ominous, the pariahs.
II. The Pariahs
It was probably the wrong decision to go on a journal hunt at 2 in the morning, because that consequently left me up till the morning, my eyes burning from staring at the screen for hours, but my brain surging with compassion , understanding and desire to have known the writer on a personal basis. He had so much to say and I found myself just rereading some phrases over and over again because I felt like he was reading my mind or writing down my soul’s content.
I aim to truly find myself by the end of this journey. I acknowledge that this post has been all over the place but this has been occupying me for weeks and I just couldn’t wrap my head around my strange cravings to explore the unknown or the rejected.
I feel if I go on any longer, I will begin to ramble and rambling never gets anyone far. So hopefully I will attempt to explain my feelings and thoughts better through the course of this adventure.